This Kid Sucks

In my life I have come across my fair share of annoying kids/people. But very few of these people have made me wish that the load of hot and salty that created them had either gone straight into a reservoir tip or some broads digestive tract more than this little fruit cake in the Windows commercial

Now unfortunately I can't really pin down exactly why I hate this kid, mainly because the aura of doucherey that he gives off overpowers my sensors. I really hope they gave him a script for this though because any eight year old that says "let me screen this puppy for you" is nearly at the point of no return on the path to be a pretentious douche the rest of his life. And by pretentious douche I mean this kid will be making lame english teacher jokes such as the classic "I don't know CAN you go to the washroom?" by the age of 11.

As some of you may know I'm an Apple guy so I really have no interest in getting into the Mac vs PC debate because thats just overly familiar territory, like on par with Alyssa Milano's ham wallet in the Dodgers clubhouse.

One thing that really upsets me about this add though is the closing "I'm a PC and I'm eight years old." The kids not a fucking PC he's a kid, although I imagine the frustration one would experience hanging out with him would be similar to that of working with an eight year old PC. But seriously... I'm a PC??? Thats right up on par with "Thanks for being a sport" in terms of calling things something that makes no sense.

I mean I could be the most co-operative motherfucker around yet I still would not be a sport. No matter how much I take shit in stride or whatever else is necessary to receive sport designation I would not be a sport. There will never be the National Dineley Association where teams compete at Dineley to see who is the best, just like this kid will never have someone operate him with one hand while they beat off... ok maybe thats a bad example, but this kid will never serve any of the functionality associated with a computer, just say I can use a PC for fuck sakes.

Upon doing my final read through of this post I just wanted to apologize for 2 things, I seem to suck at sentences after my little hiatus there hopefully that skill will return to me soon, also the entire second half of the post seems to be headed towards pretentious douche category losing my shit about grammar and such which is touch ironic, but yeah whatever enjoy.


  1. AAAAAAaaaaaaaaahhha your blog is the best one I read Dineley.


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